Only YOU Can Save Yourself

Dearest Beautiful Spirits,

After spending yesterday in bed, searching for a reason to keep trying, I’ve awakened today with reasonS to keep trying.

Here’s the thing, I had to acknowledge that there is something within me that is destructive. It fights all of the good in me, as if it’s trying to prevent its inevitable death once I get the hang of thriving as my authentic self. This destructive (for lack of a better term) part of me is a strong son-of-a-b&tch, fortunately the rest of me is even more powerful.

You see it’s so much easier to blame something outside of yourself when your life doesn’t seem to go as want it to. At this time in my life, there is no one or nothing to blame, yet I still feel as though I am not where I should be.

I’ve even tried to blame it on being an introvert, unfortunately everywhere I look there is a successful introvert thriving because of who they are. I honestly believe as an idealist, dreamer, INFP I often get stuck in the creation phase of things and lose interest shortly thereafter because…monotony of day-to-day business is not appealing to me. Funny thing is, I am definitely at the point in my life where working for someone else, helping to build their dreams is simply NOT AN OPTION! I’ve managed other people’s businesses, it’s past time for me to put my big girl panties on and manage my own business. HUuuuuuuumph! *chuckles*

Bottom line is, I’ve been afraid of following through with my dreams/ideas because lack of support has subliminally taught me I am unworthy of fulfilling my dreams/ideas. Growing up, no one ever saw the splendor in my dreams/ideas and I wasn’t encouraged to pursue them. If the ones who love you don’t seem to believe in you, how can you expect anyone else will?

As the years went by, the twinkle in my eyes along with my fearlessness slowly evaporated and I began waiting for someone to save me (i.e. from the bully in school, the adults who thought it was okay to violate my trust, an abusive spouse…) yet no one ever came to save me.

 

YOU ARE WORTH SO MUCH MORE THAN YOU MAY KNOW AT THIS MOMENT; DON’T EVER GIVE UP ON YOURSELF. ITS TIME TO BE YOUR OWN HERO…

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Being saved was a deep longing I needed fulfilled but much to my chagrin, it never happened until the Universe told me clearly and with certainty, “You and only you have the power to save yourself. It’s time for you to do so with all that you are; all that I’ve created you to be. You are never alone, I am always here unconditionally loving, protecting and guiding you.”

After such a spiritual awakening, there is no way I could continue waiting for anyone to save me so I made a conscious effort to begin saving myself. I am not perfect nor always happy but my personal power is something that I rely on to keep moving forward instead of allowing myself to give up.

Let me just tell you, my entire being…mind, body, spirit, soul and heart gang up on me if I try to give up; seriously sore throat, chest pains, back pains, headaches, spiritual disconnection etc. The part of me that is not destructive has become so much stronger than the part trying it’s best to shut me down therefore, my only choice is to keep moving forward.

Wishing You Love, Peace & Courage during your personal journey…

SereneNSassySoul

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Saying vs Meaning

Things people say and what they sometimes actually mean, albeit most times unintentionally…

Be strong, be courageous, speak your mind, don’t take crap from anyone…just don’t be this way with me.

Learn to say no and always put your needs first…just don’t be this way with me.

Be all you can be, never stop chasing your dreams…just don’t surpass where I am in my life.

I love and accept you just as you are…just maybe change this or that; just as long as you do things MY way.

Always keep it real no matter what…just as long as what you say or do doesn’t make me uncomfortable.

I’ve always got your back…just as long as someone doesn’t offer me a better deal.

Honor yourself always and pay attention to what you feel…just get over it already and deal with it; life is hard!

Sure you should have others friends that share your interests, I’m not jealous…just as long as when I call for you you come running.

I’m not in competition with you at all, you are my friend…just as long as I don’t see a chance to shine and leave you in the dust!

You are free to do as you please, live your life…just as long as you allow me to control the parts I want to.

There’s no way you can actually make that work…I live my life full of fear, how dare you be brave trying to achieve your goals.

I remember spending so much time seeking approval from various people in my life, yet wondering why it seemed as though I needed to constantly prove myself to have their love. I lost so much of myself at one point, looking in the mirror staring at a stranger. Always trying to please those whose approval I wanted, thought I needed. Always  trying to be the obedient and loyal daughter, employee, girlfriend/wife…

Although I’ve always walked to the beat of my own drum, I craved acceptance from people I loved; at the very least for them to love and accept me same as I felt for them. I realize they all loved me as best as they could. People often don’t realize how their words/actions may adversely affect someone whether intentional or not. Replacing judgement and/or a need to control with mindfulness when connecting with others will go a long way with improving communication within any relationship.

Approval of anyone outside of yourself should never be necessary for your to make your own choices. Honor yourself always by trusting what you feel about a situation/person and make your choice based on this not what someone else may think; no matter who the person is. You are NOT your mother or father, sister or brother… therefore you are not required to make the decisions they would make.

I always hear the term “follow your heart”… it’s usually spoken by people who are successful in their chosen profession, relationships, spiritual, personal self etc. and it used to aggravate me until now…

Now, at this very moment I understand the benefits of following your heart. Your heart is your truest, highest self. It’s the part of you that you’ve pushed away and perhaps buried because of life experienced that were uncomfortable. It’s the part you used to consult before you did anything when you were a child. It’s the part of you that always knows what  and who is best for you. It’s your compass and it’s your guru; the part of you that contains all of the answers you need.

My Dear, the answers you seek, the answers you need are only contained within you, never outside of you. Others can offer tidbits, maybe even a starting point for you but you must go deep within to access the answers that will assist with living the life you were created to live.

Today I don’t rely on what others think or any unsolicited advice they may give unless it resonates with me (which for me means it comes from a higher Source). I don’t wait for approval from anyone before I make a decision about MY life. I don’t allow what people say about me affect who I am. The only person that stands in my way or prevents me from doing anything is me… I am the only challenge I face from time to time; even facing myself is becoming easier each day.

***Cheers to honoring yourself and living the life you know you are meant to live.***

Wishing you all great Love, Peace & Blessings…

SereneNSassySoul

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I’ve been ridiculed most of this lifetime and now that I am older, I can see there are different sets of rules for people who consider themselves “normal” and people like me who walk our very own unique, individual path.

People who usually dish out crap, certainly don’t appreciate when it’s thrown back to them. LoL People who use the term “oh just get over it already and move on” want empathy when it’s their turn to feel bad or experience something that is NOT so easy to move on from.

I’ve always been fascinated by humans especially how some things are ok for some but not for others…

Here’s the thing…I’m so grateful that I’m no longer the soft-hearted, walk-all-over-me HSP, INFJ/INFP, Empath that I used to be and people are beginning to learn to keep their crap to themselves instead of trying to give it to me. I’m still the HSP, INFJ/INFP, Empath I’ve been created to be however, I will put you in your place if you even think of trying to get at me!

Needless to say, my circle of people has dwindled to almost nothing…which is ok by me because I don’t want to be around people who don’t love and accept me as I am…all of me.

Let today’s spilled thoughts remind you to ALWAYS stand up for yourself! Yes it will feel uncomfortable if you are a newbie at standing up for yourself but trust that…

  1. standing up for yourself…gets easier the more you do it
  2. standing up for yourself…becomes a natural process for you
  3. standing up for yourself…FEELS GREAT

People like to share their crap but it doesn’t mean you have to accept it. Do what feels right to you; honoring yourself always. Now I’m not suggesting that you become aggressive or confrontational but you deserve to honor, support and love yourself completely. Most of all, you do NOT deserve to be handed crap from anyone; no matter who they are!

Oh and…don’t forget to stand up for the those who may not be able to stand up for themselves (i.e.; seniors children, animals…). I mastered standing up for others as a child but sort of just learning to really stand up for myself…flabbergasting isn’t it? LoL

And Hey Beautiful Spirit…You’ve got this! 🙂

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As always sending you great Love, Peace & Blessings….

SereneNSassySoul

She is Rising…

Dearest Beautiful Spirits,

This post is dedicated to a special client whose personal progress and healing journey has been amazing to witness. She asked me to describe her beginning to her current state of transition and these are the words that came to mind. She wanted to share her experience so that anyone experiencing the same will know they are not alone.

Love, Peace & Blessings,

SereneNSassy Soul

She IS Rising…

She’s  felt swept up in  a never ending cycle of storms…hurricanes, tornadoes, even tsunami at time. Her waves flow high and low…

Her depth immearsureable; no one has ever seen Her  beginning or end…not even Her

She’s avoided releasing the storms within until now; She realizes now that She must be who She is authentically at all costs… Life is not worth living hiding “pieces” of Herself

She’s dimmed Her light for far too long; wasting Her energy on so many, never saving much for Herself until now…

She’s denied Her gifts because of what She’s been conditioned to believe by “the world”; they were dormant and now She fights to unleash them to fulfill Her purpose

She was exhausted and tried to give up but Her body and spirit began imploding causing unbearable pain; She had no choice but to concede to Her body and spirit, Her heart and mind

She finally understands She has the power to calm Her storms or increase their velocity depending on the situation She faces; no longer afraid of losing control

She finally accepts Her light and Her darkness; each half completes Her; embracing Her wholeness loving and honoring each part

She knows each moment will not be perfect but nevertheless She will progress along Her journey; not looking backward or forward

She’s unwilling to fall so far again; the “hole” has finally been destroyed

Those who love Her will continue to stand with Her, others will fall back; their choice will be respected no matter what they choose

The Universe has spoken! Her Spirit has spoken! Finally She has attained clarity to be exactly who She was created to be…

What’s different this time around…SHE is the difference, mind, body, spirit, heart!

Always on time…

Good Morning Beautiful Spirits!

During a New Day filled with many beautiful moments entwined with moments of pure frustration, I was blessed to “stumble upon” an article to help bring things into perspective. I’ve felt somewhat “stuck” past few weeks, unsure of my next steps; being passionate about so many things feels like a gift and a curse…

The author spoke directly to me; her examples were akin to my present thoughts, ideas, concerns, passions etc. The most pertinent tip: make a list of your values to distinguish your passions from things you enjoy. Make a list? I despise lists or anything that requires me to follow it; innate rebel with no change ahead (chucklessss). Restriction of any kind nearly extinguishes my fire, however, I’m at a great turning point, change is happening and I ‘m open so here’s my top five…

  1. Freedom; all encompassing freedom
  2. Fulfilling my purpose
  3. Sharing my gifts
  4. Creative flow
  5. Traveling

Reviewing the list has made me realize I do not wish to be sedentary nor do I wish to be locked in to a particular location, time or thing-to-do. I want to awaken each New Day able to explore and go with the flow…. Not in an irresponsible/not doing my part in this world way; I simply do not wish to be confined to anything or anyone…FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Now comes the not-so-easy part…

I’m diligent and committed to flowing naturally; it feels great to be in this space at this time presented with infinite possibilities.

Do you awaken each New Day excited about what awaits you? Do you feel “stuck” at times? Are you fulfilled? Do you want more? Are you honoring your authentic self? If you’ve answered no to any of these questions,  I hope you will begin YOUR list of values to gain the clarity you need to continue moving forward.

As always I’d love for you to share your thoughts so we can create an open dialogue.

Sending you all wishes of great Love, Peace & many Blessings…

SereneNSassySoul

 

 

 

Back to Me

Recently someone asked, “What will make you happy?” When I didn’t respond immediately she advised me to remember things I did as a child to make myself happy; things that felt so good to me, I did them without thinking. It’s difficult to remember so far back; especially when you’ve closed the door to that part of yourself due to life experiences, familial and societal conditioning. It’s easy to forget yourself as a carefree child beginning each New Day with wonder and excitement; void of expectations, simply going with the flow of the Universe.

During this lifetime’s journey I became less carefree, still somewhat of a rebel but I learned to suppress my authentic self mostly because it made others uncomfortable. At some point I gave up craving freedom; replaced by a need for security and foundation. At some point I began following rules (albeit silently protesting) simply because it was expected of me. I became a pleaser instead of doing what pleased me so I would be afforded some peace…or so I thought. My authentic self was pushed further and further into the deepest part of me; safe and sound so that I could “survive” in the “real world”.

Fast forward…I’ve spent the past few years “getting to know myself”; initially extremely disappointed by the impostor in the mirror. What the hell? Germ phobic; when I was a child you couldn’t get me to come inside even to wash my hands and one of my favorite things to do was take care animals, especially horses. Disallowing intimate love in my life because relationships did not work out and I just didn’t feel like trying again. Since I can remember, I’ve always been in love with love so removing love from my life made no sense. I was a dare-devil as a child and fearless; as an adult always worrying and filled with anxiety.

The great news is once you understand who you are versus who you’ve become, possibilities of becoming who you were created to be are infinite. Today I’m free once again; free of anxiety, fearless, determined, powerfully in-tune with my authentic self and my purpose for being. I love and support the uninhibited child within unconditionally; the peace it’s brought me is more than I ever imagined possible. I am healthy; I am whole; I am me…

I’m sharing this to inspire you to remember who you truly are (if you haven’t already done so). A Beautiful Spirit said to me yesterday, “I want to do whatever you are doing because you are always smiling and pleasant.” My simple response, “I was sick and tired of being sick and tired so I decided to heal myself inside out and you can do the same. I must tell you that facing yourself is the most difficult thing you will ever do but it’s so worth blessings and clarity it will bring.”

We don’t have to accept the unhappiness we see in the world today. We can make changes one Beautiful Spirit at a time; change begins within. We are only responsible for who we are but we inspire others to be the best they can be leading by example.

As always, I wish you all great Love, Peace & Blessings…

© SerenenSassySoul 2015