Back to Me

Recently someone asked, “What will make you happy?” When I didn’t respond immediately she advised me to remember things I did as a child to make myself happy; things that felt so good to me, I did them without thinking. It’s difficult to remember so far back; especially when you’ve closed the door to that part of yourself due to life experiences, familial and societal conditioning. It’s easy to forget yourself as a carefree child beginning each New Day with wonder and excitement; void of expectations, simply going with the flow of the Universe.

During this lifetime’s journey I became less carefree, still somewhat of a rebel but I learned to suppress my authentic self mostly because it made others uncomfortable. At some point I gave up craving freedom; replaced by a need for security and foundation. At some point I began following rules (albeit silently protesting) simply because it was expected of me. I became a pleaser instead of doing what pleased me so I would be afforded some peace…or so I thought. My authentic self was pushed further and further into the deepest part of me; safe and sound so that I could “survive” in the “real world”.

Fast forward…I’ve spent the past few years “getting to know myself”; initially extremely disappointed by the impostor in the mirror. What the hell? Germ phobic; when I was a child you couldn’t get me to come inside even to wash my hands and one of my favorite things to do was take care animals, especially horses. Disallowing intimate love in my life because relationships did not work out and I just didn’t feel like trying again. Since I can remember, I’ve always been in love with love so removing love from my life made no sense. I was a dare-devil as a child and fearless; as an adult always worrying and filled with anxiety.

The great news is once you understand who you are versus who you’ve become, possibilities of becoming who you were created to be are infinite. Today I’m free once again; free of anxiety, fearless, determined, powerfully in-tune with my authentic self and my purpose for being. I love and support the uninhibited child within unconditionally; the peace it’s brought me is more than I ever imagined possible. I am healthy; I am whole; I am me…

I’m sharing this to inspire you to remember who you truly are (if you haven’t already done so). A Beautiful Spirit said to me yesterday, “I want to do whatever you are doing because you are always smiling and pleasant.” My simple response, “I was sick and tired of being sick and tired so I decided to heal myself inside out and you can do the same. I must tell you that facing yourself is the most difficult thing you will ever do but it’s so worth blessings and clarity it will bring.”

We don’t have to accept the unhappiness we see in the world today. We can make changes one Beautiful Spirit at a time; change begins within. We are only responsible for who we are but we inspire others to be the best they can be leading by example.

As always, I wish you all great Love, Peace & Blessings…

© SerenenSassySoul 2015

 

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Spilled Thoughts 04/18/2015

Greeting Beautiful Spirits!

I never knew anyone could make me feel what he makes me feel and thanks to him I have a clear understanding of what Love truly is. Love feels wonderful, uplifting; never painful. Love is not perfect but it certainly makes you the best you can possibly be offering lessons and blessings to learn and grow with.

Let’s be clear loving another will not complete you; that work must be done before Love can happen. You must be whole, loving and accepting yourself unconditionally before you can experience Love; I will leave you ponder this based on your experiences.

What is your definition of Love? Will you share your Love experience? Each experience is different but at it’s core Love is beautiful.

Here are my spilled thoughts and as always I’d love to hear from you.

It’s him; there is only him

My heart craves him

I need to see his smile, inhale his scent, feel his skin, hear his voice

Nothing and no one fills the void his absence creates

I don’t feel like speaking with anyone, really

I don’t want to go anywhere, really

I just want him to talk with; to be with

Enveloped within his love, support, encouragement…

I’m whole without him but a better me with him

His presence calms and stokes the fire within me

I can go at it alone but there is no reason to

I feel him deeply in the middle of my chest; his happiness, peace, chaos…

I’ve spent too much of this lifetime without him

Our time is now, forever thereafter

I’m ready…I’m finally ready for all of him…

© SereneNSassySoul 2015